In this series, professionals share what they'd do differently — and keep the same. Follow the stories here and write your own (please use #IfIWere22 in your post).
When I graduated college, all I wanted was to get a job that looked good on my resume and would pay me a respectable salary. When I got a position at Banker’s Trust, I felt lucky to have found a “good” job that would make my friends and family proud. I had no idea how impressionable I was at that age.
In banking, the core motivational driver was personal financial gain, cultivating a fiercely competitive environment. Over my six years in finance, I learned to approach my career as an individual sport, where I was judged by the size of my bonus and how quickly I was promoted. One morning I fell to the floor of my office, feeling an electric jolt in my chest as a result of stress. Although it was not a heart attack, the message was clear. I had worked incredibly hard to get to the top but I was there alone—and it was unfulfilling.
When I left banking, I decided to pursue my life long dream of being an entrepreneur and quickly discovered that success could not be made in a silo. In fact, the bigger your ambitions are, the more you need help from others. My focus quickly shifted to learning how to empower others. I sought out other inspirational leaders and former mentors and did everything I could to study how they managed people. Over time, I realized that the most important qualities of a leader are empathy, trust, and patience. True leadership is more about helping others than taking from your team.
If I could do it again, I would evaluated my first job out of college based on whether I could learn these soft skills. Even more than the company you work for, your first manager will lay the foundation for your long-term professional success. You will learn more from this person than just the basic mechanics of doing your job. He will shape how you communicate and collaborate with others. He will give a taste of what it means to be a good leader or a bad one.
When trying to evaluate whether a manager is a good leader, ask questions like “How do you define your own success?” Try to gauge whether the person focuses on their own personal achievement or the success of their team and company.
At 22, I evaluated my first job based on what I could get out of it. But I have since learned that you can achieve much greater success if you focus on what you can give. Ultimately, I have realized that success is not a measure of your salary, title or degree, but the impact you have others and the collective happiness of the people you touch.
