Tech Director @ Amazon | I help professionals lead with impact and fast-track their careers through the power of mentorship
Conflict gets a bad rap in the workplace. Early in my career, I believed conflict had no place in a healthy workplace. As I progressed, I realized that it was quite the contrary. The lack of conflict isn't a sign of a healthy work culture, rather it is an indication that important debates, discussions and differing viewpoints are being disregarded or suppressed. This insight revealed another key aspect: high-performing teams do not shy away from conflict. They embrace it, leveraging diverse opinions to drive optimal outcomes for customers. What sets these teams apart is their ability to handle conflict constructively. So how can this be achieved? I reached out to my friend Andrea Stone, Leadership Coach and Founder of Stone Leadership, for some tips on effectively managing conflict in the workplace. Here's the valuable guidance she provided: 1. Pause: Take a moment to assess your feelings in the heat of the moment. Be curious about your emotions, resist immediate reactions, and take the time to understand the why behind your feelings. 2. Seek the Other Perspective: Engage genuinely, listen intently, show real interest, and ask pertinent questions. Remember to leave your preconceived judgments at the door. 3. Acknowledge Their Perspective: Express your understanding of their viewpoint. If their arguments have altered your perspective, don't hesitate to share this with them. 4. Express Your Viewpoint: If your opinion remains unswayed, seek permission to explain your perspective and experiences. Remember to speak from your viewpoint using "I" statements. 5. Discuss the Bigger Objective: Identify common grounds and goals. Understand that each person might have a different, bigger picture in mind. This process can be taxing, so prepare beforehand. In prolonged conflict situations, don't hesitate to suggest breaks to refresh and refuel mentally, physically, and emotionally. 6. Know Your Limits: If the issue is of significant importance to you, be aware of your boundaries. For those familiar with negotiation tactics, know your BATNA (Best Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement). 7. Finalize Agreements: Once an agreement has been reached, continue the engagement to agree on responsibilities and timeframes. This ensures clarity on the outcome and commitments made. PS: Approach such situations with curiosity and assume others are trying to do the right thing. 🔁 Useful? I would appreciate a repost. Image Credit: Hari Haralambiev ----- Follow me, tap the (🔔) Omar Halabieh for daily Leadership and Career posts.
I love the conflict pyramid - it's a great way to focus our feelings and thoughts around #conflict. Let's recognize our thoughts, feelings and actions around conflict. Do we move to or away from it (and with whom and in what situation) and let's work out how to use it as a tool. Thanks for sharing Omar Halabieh - and thanks for the shout out. I am an equally big fan of your work.
Thanks for sharing my illustration, Omar 😊 Great tips from Andrea for turning a disagreement into a healthy debate. Thanks for emphasizing the message about conflict. I recently wrote a piece on how to use team conflicts as a tool. I'm adding the essence here: 1. Start your discussion by connecting on a personal level. 2. Identify and visualize conflict points. 3. Facilitate the discussion so that people have passion & respect at the same time. Adding a link to the article if someone wants to read further: https://softskillspills.com/from-unhealthy-team-conflicts-to-healthy-debates/
conflict is a tool, though many tools also cause conflict ;) cool pyramid -- feels accurate
Great sharing! And in my experience, it is so helpful to intentionally build the awareness that my thoughts are not me. Hence when people disagree or reject my thoughts, they are doing exactly that, not necessarily disagreeing or rejecting me. It's been a game changer!
Conflict doesn't always have to be negative. Having different opinions is technically conflict, discussing them and looking at the pros and cons makes for better, stronger teams
I agree totally Omar Halabieh. The PS is important to understand that everyone (should) has the right intentions but maybe different perspectives on how to achieve the results (no. 5). I try my best to take my personal feelings out and try to rely more on facts. It helps me not to feel my thoughts are attacked and not want to do the attacking.
"Conflict gets a bad rap in the workplace, but it’s not necessarily a negative sign. In fact, the absence of conflict can indicate that important discussions and diverse viewpoints are being suppressed.
These are really valuable guidance, Omar Halabieh. Thank you for sharing.
Love this breakdown of conflict in the workplace, Omar Halabieh So true - healthy conflict can spark creativity and better solutions.
Executive coach to global CEOs and CXO’s | Named one of the world’s 50 most influential coaches by Thinkers50 | Harvard Business Review Contributor | Wharton MBA | Master Certified Coach (MCC)-Int’l Coach Federation
1yThe emphasis on pausing to understand one's own emotions during a conflict highlights the importance of emotional intelligence in leadership and can lead to more thoughtful and effective communication.