Do you believe that you can be nice in business and be still be successful?
I have recently re-read the excellent book called "The Power of Nice" by Linda Kaplan Thaler and Robin Koval. Thaler and Koval talk in their book about the importance of being nice in business and how you don't have to be aggressive to be successful. I wondered what people thought and have you any experience of being nice and winning business?
Answers (69)
Salik R.
Salik Rafiq, Freelance programmer and mobile developer : salikmrafiq@gmail.com
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Yes of course, absolutely! If your business is based on repeat customers, yes being nice will not only bring you repeat business, but also further word of mouth business.
Though I do think there is a point where you might be asked to bend right over for a customer, to the breaking point and there you should stop really. There is a point where you can be too nice where your customers begin to take advantage of you.
I recall a recent experience where we were looking for some products for our house. We really were happy with the purchase, not only was the product great at a great price, but the salesman was a nice man who was not agressive and was willing to let us think about things.
The only time to be agressive is in your ideas, your timelines, your deadlines and your marketing. But with customers and people you should be nice.
Kelly B.
Co-owner at Buyers Meeting Point
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Hi Pete,
I am living proof that you can be nice and stay in business. The key is not to be a pushover, because then you will not earn the respect of your colleagues and clients. More aggressive people may win business in the short run but not be able to keep it - I think being genuinely nice is a long term strategy. An approach I use is to anticipate people's needs and concerns. That shows attentiveness while also demonstrating that you have enough experience to know what to expect and how to handle the outcome. Like any approach, "being nice" has to come naturally in order to work. No-one likes a kiss-up or a yes-man: and both are easy to spot.
I'm going to check out that book!
Kelly
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Dave M.
Professional trade show booth traffic builder and party entertainer. Corporate and private sector events.
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I am nice to all my clients and all those who I come across at various events all around. If I wasn't, I'd be out of business in short order...
Clarification added 12 months ago:
So all those who answer no to your question are now admitting to be mean bastards...? Does anyone really want to do business with someone like that?
Bill N.
Content Creator and Technical Writer
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I think those who network effectively and have a sufficiently deep work history full of satisfied clients can succeed, but a nice personality divorced of a value proposition is not going to bring in the money over the long term.
Dave C.
Consultant Project Manager who boosts cooperation and motivation to lead extraordinary successes. Writer.
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I win business partly by letting the potential client know that I am genuinely interested in their concerns and dedicated to bringing their problems and hopes to a successful conclusion.
Being genuinely nice to people contributes enormously to gaining acceptance, aids communication, and helps ensure ongoing co-operation.
I like being nice, smiling at people, checking everyone is okay, being jolly and making people smile.
Nobody will want to do business with you if you are not nice... Though one has to be just assertive to not become a "pushover" when doing business.
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Cheryl R.
Founder and Principal of CatapultMe and Cheryl Roshak Associates. Transforming Lives for Positive Change.
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Nice is a vague term. It's sounds just too nice! :) What I think you mean is that you can be respectful, polite, have integrity, values, and kind to others and not be a pushover if you follow your beliefs and are ethical. I've run my business like that for 25 years and I am well respected. But don't lie to me or try to put one over on me. I can also be as fierce as a mother lion who is protecting her cubs. I have principles that I live by and I expect others to honor them also. I've been very successful. I've only had to be a lion two or three times in 25 years.
Glenn F.
IT management Guru, also helped create the ultimate Internet Marketing Machine with CMS, and social media integration
Being in a service industry like I am, and having to deal with people in occasional stressful scenarios, ie computer rage, I'm sure you've all been their with that one? I would say that being diplomatic, honest and empathic and occasionally assertive are essential to good customer relations.
There is however a fine line between being nice and helpful and being abused by a client who takes advantage of your genial nature. Be nice but never be abused, sometimes I have found very occasionally when I know the relationship is strong enough, an "adjustment" has to take place to redress the balance, after all it is a working relationship, and respect must be shown from both sides.
I am proud of my customer retention ratio and being respectful, honest empathic and ethical has held me in good stead, but I have to admit, that very very rarely when a relationship is not working I have took the tough decision to walk away from it, in the end it is better for both parties and you get keep some dignity and sanity.
To finish I will say people buy people, nobody wants to deal with aggressive overbearing people, we would much rather do business with friends.
Phil L.
Information Technology Manager/Consultant
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I've only met one person successful in business that was a nice.
Barrett P.
Senior Financial Executive, Consultant, C.P.A.
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Absolutely - just don't be afraind or a push over, neither oif which is needed to be "nice", Beyond that honey still attracts more flies than vinegar.
Barrett Peterson
Erica F.
Social Media Optimizer, Publisher at ALC Publishing, President of Yuricon
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Absolutely being nice is important. But it's also important to remember that people hate facing cold, hard truths and when they are forced to, they blame the person who made the decision, or the messenger. Then, you are no longer "nice." Empathize, but stand firm.
Bernard G.
Programme, Project & Change expert
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I wouldn't agree it is an absolute - but certainly there are plenty of situations where people aren't nice, but would do better if they were, and plenty of industries that could be a lot nicer without losing any success and often gaining some.
The difficulty is that it isn't a change that works very well unilaterally - while there are occasions in which one person can just decide to be nice and improve the tone, there are far more where they will then find themselves at a disadvantage. If we could all just make ourselves a notch nicer it would be good, but it is hard to take the risk and be the first! (I have done this myself, but then I'm more of a risk-taker than most).
Nani I.
Independent Hospitality Professional
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Yes. Be nice, but not a doormat.
Khalid A.
Your revenue is directly proportionate to the quality and intelligence of your MARKETING
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being nice, polite, pleasant but firm. not naive, gullible or appear weak.
Francisco L.
Quality and process improvement
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It depends on what you mean by nice (honest or stupid?) and what you mean by success (wise or rich?).
In collaborative games, you must to be nice to win.
Fungus
Naomi T.
Owner at Pink Flamingo Cosmetics
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I've written a blog post related to this question (the link is below). There have been some great comments made here. I don't want to be repetitive, but here are some key points:
1. You should be nice, respectful and honest to your customers and other stakeholders. This will help you build an excellent reputation. We shouldn't be tempted to forget our core values.
2. This doesn't mean that you should be a "doormat" as others have put it. Letting your customers get the best of you isn't good for your business in more than just one way (and it isn't good for you personally, either!!)
3. Just because you are nice doesn't mean you can't be aggressive! Go after what you want, but don't step on others to get there.
I hope that helps!
Links:
John W.
Whole print project management, from concept through to completion, using sustainable materials, methods & procedures.
It has always been my policy that I'll treat others as I would want to be treated. This works especially well when things go a little wrong and, having kept my powder dry, I can then express my feels with much better effect, then return to my normal manner.
Customers can test my patience and, importantly, they are NOT always right. Client management is critical to having a successful business. It takes time, but my clients respect my role and it helps me to be able to "guide" them to the right decision and maintain my profitability, with a smile.
I must be getting it right as I've got customers who've been with me fr over 10 years.
I'll invariably go the extra mile beyond their expectations and making a bit of a drama out of a crisis works wonders.
So yes, I find being nice works for me and my business
Pete - If you want to invest in yourself towards long term business success then I believe it is a necessity to be 'nice' and respectful to others. The aggressive approach may well get you short term results but it will not build longer term value. I know a few small business owners who fit into the latter description and I know that in 5 years time their current business will not be around. You 100% do NOT need to be bullying or aggressive - but you do need to be driven, strong minded and passionate and sometime the line between the two can be very fine!
Fran E.
Building a community of small businesses through offering flexible office space in Yorkshire
The trouble is with the word "nice" - we are all lead to think that this is a wishy washy word and equates to being a bit soft!
Looking at all the answers and the phrases people have used we all feel a need to qualify what we mean by nice...............friendly, fare, respectful, honest, optimistic.
How could you hope to run a successful business without these, and if that means I'm "nice" then thats just.......nice!
Absolutely yes. Your question does of course beg another question - which is to define what success means; it is different for all of us.
I know a few people who I would not consider to be "nice" and they have not been successful in their businesses. This just goes to show that not being "nice" does not mean that you will be successful.
Personally I would always rather work with people I believe to be "nice"
Hi Peter,
What Definition are you using for "nice"? I have also found being Nice is important combined with aggressive - it is a balancing act.
Chris B.
Business Operations and Business Change Management Professional
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Depends, being overly nice comes across as false and puts some people on guard.
Integrity, openness, honesty and humility in business, always works for me and built me contacts and business based on trust and respect, not just because I was "nice"
its nice to be important but its important to be nice.
Ravi K.
Startup Mason
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You can be nice and still be aggressive about your goals or pitstops for your business..It doesnt mean that you have to be ruthless to get your work done.
Cheers
Ravi Kikan
Startup Specialist Group
http://lnkd.in/9GqY8P
David P.
Head of Marketing & Social Business at EnergySys Production Allocation Cloud
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I find being nice is the ONLYway to do business.
I've cut out all of the not-nice people in my supply chain for all my companies, and cut out quite a few not-nice customers.
That's actually part of my definition of a successful business - having the ability to be nice to deal with, and refusing to deal with bad guys.
Regards, David
http://twitter.com/clarocada
Links:
What is right and what is expedient are rarely found on the same side
Karen M.
Owns Study in Yorkshire, Education & English Language Consultant & Trainer
Hi Pete
I think it's vital to be nice. I wouldn't want to give business to someone that I thought was too aggressive or pushy regardless of the product/service they were selling. However, you need the goods to back you up, as just being nice isn't going to get you much business!
Karen
Caitlin K.
Author: "Malled: My Unintentional Career in Retail" (Portfolio, April 2011)
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Being generous and authentic work well. I'm wary of the word "nice" as are others here. But every time I give away time, energy and knowledge --- certainly to those who understand that it *is* a gift and a choice -- it comes back, from them or another source.
I am genuinely helpful and friendly to many people I work with. But those who take advantage, and they are out there, can't expect that response from me or anyone else.
