The family - work life balance is important to a successful career. How do you measure the amount of time you allot to your family and how do you know that it is enough?
Is it assumed that when you come home in the evening that you will be spending the entire evening together? Is there a specific time interval you have for family time? Is this just something you play by ear, communicating when you feel you should be putting in more time? No need to answer all the questions, basically how do you allocate your time with respect to your family?
Good Answers (9)
Sahar A.
Diversity& Inclusion|Leadership training|Social Media Marketing|Social Media Training|Public Speaker|Culture Competence
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I believe we all play it by ear more or less, for me personally weekends are family no matter what every now and then I would have a seminar to give for a couple of hours but that it is it, I am a female with a career but I am still a wife, evenings are my families time, I go to 1 or 2 networking events a month maximum and most of the time I ask my husband to acompany me
Family comes first for me
The question can be interpreted as "How do I justify how much or little time I spend with my family." I think about it in exactly the opposite way. How do I justify the time when I am not caring for my own mental and physical health, not maintaining my relationships with the people I care about, and and am not helping them to become better people? If you're set thing up right, the people you work with are also people you care. People first!
Clarification added January 24, 2010:
The fingers really didn't work as intended. It should read, "If you've set things up right, the people you work with are also people you care for."
Zika K.
Experienced business and strategy leader in online classifieds
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I think this is somewhat driven by the stage of your life/career and your experiences - at least this was the case for me.
Personally, up until recently my career was my main priority even though I valued my family more - in a way, it was a means to an end, ie the focus on my career allowed me to support those I love, even though I may not have been there with them.
More recently, this has changed and family has become my number one priority and I am looking at making work fit around my family so that I can spend quality time with them. You only live once and I've learnt that its better not to have to look back and have regrets.
Also, as Brian and Sahar mention family is first no matter what and for some people, this is how they approach their work/life balance.from the start.
I think it is at times difficult to know how much time is enough - life can be difficult so you need to make the most of it and if you value time with your family, that is how you should spend your time. As Ron mentions, working with people that share the same values makes things easier.
Charlene N.
Senior Finance & Operations Leader -- Passionate about Profitability
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No matter which side of the coin you choose, you will never really be sure that you are correct. Depending on the day, where you are in your career, what crisis is occuring when and where, the balancing act is simply that. A juggling act. You will have periods of guilt. There are no definitive answers to this question.
It comes down to what works for you and your family. Everyone is different. And everyone has different priorities.
Julian N.
Engineering Project Controls & Management Professional seeking my next challenge in the UK or Canada.
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As earlier answers.
The main contributing factors are the personalities of the the people involved and what drives/motivates them.
For me, I like being able to work flexibly as the job demands. That could mean being in the office at 3am and staying until 11pm but the next project may allow me to work from home, spending the morning horse riding before working until the early hours or weekends.
The caveat I will use is that I've been single for a long time so have few pressures that are out of my control and I know this doesn't suit everyone.
First of all, if your family isn't complaining about the lack of time you spend with them, you're probably OK! No, seriously, I think that's very much an individual decision and the answers are as different as the number of families involved. If you and your family are SATISFIED with your co-existing relationships and the time you spend together, then all is probably well. The key word to remember here is BALANCE. Good luck!
It isn't the quantity of time but the quality that counts. If you are with your family but your mind is at work, that isn't quality. Plan for some quality time with them - a meal together, time talking, and engage each of them in a topic important to them. Also share what is important to you. If you have to solve a work problem at home, explain that and when you will be available to them again.
Kathi B.
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I'm the wife, so I'm looking at it from a different perspective...
If you want to know if you're giving enough time to family... just ask. If you can't give what your spouse wants, make a plan, define your goals, and set an endpoint. Half of the problem is not agreeing on priorities so you can both be on board with the situation.
I was willing to accept rationed time while my husband worked toward his career. He told me the plan up front and I agreed to it. I let the kids have what time he could give-those were our priorities. The problem came when he became too used to our arrangement and didn't recognize a need to slow down as we had planned. With no goal in sight, I had nothing to look forward to and neither did the kids. I eventually started participating in his career (see my blog if you want to know about the wingspouse concept) just so I could be close to him again and not grow apart. Our new arrangement was successful on more levels than we ever imagined, but it's not for everyone.
Bhalchandra P.
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I do not MIX my personal & professional life, thats my secret mantra..........in case if there is a situation, wherein I need to extinguish a fire, at home or office, I attend to that first.
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Brian C.
Independent Writing and Editing Professional
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Easy. Here is my family. The phone rings and it's some damn thing or another. I will give it 5 or 10 minutes to discuss, then order a solution. Then go back to my family.
Want me to come in and share the sweat over this crisis? Let's start with a chat about whose crisis it is, and how you could have forestalled it with intelligent planning.
Oops, time to tuck the kid into bed. Talk to you later.
