I've been passed over for promotion...twice. Should I quit?
I am an Asian immigrant working in a company where 95% of the leaders are "white males." I am an intelligent, diligent, worker and always do my job well. I have been commended by several bosses and peers for my work. However, I don't normally socialize with co-workers due to my responsibilities with family at home. Because of this, I think I am not being promoted. I have had two of my co-workers get promotions in the last 2 years and I am very sure that they are not doing the job as well as me. Should I leave the company? Is there anything else I can do?
[posted on behalf of a client]
Good Answers (11)
Wasabi, do you think you can share with your boss what your goal is? Often times it helps to be straight forward with them. Tell him/her what you are shooting for, and aks them what it would take for you to get there. The answer that is given to you might not be what you want to do. Remember, there is always sacrifice to be paid, you just need to decide what you value more, and how much you are willing to pay up front for what you want in the future. As a woman in a male dominated field I found the following very useful and I hope that you as well: http://www.imdiversity.com/villages/woman/careers_workplace_employment/prussel_successful_women.asp
Daniel J
District Leader at Primerica Financial Services and Owner, David Gordon Productions
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Your friend needs to take a hard look at himself to see whether the promotion problems are really due to the company or to some flaw in his own makeup. I certainly wouldn't quit only to find yourself in the same situation at the next job. So you need to find out the real reasons you're not being promoted. The direct method would be simply to ask. Take a non-confrontational approach, and ask your supervisor "What improvements can I make that will help me get the next promotion?" Not "Why did you promote John and not me?" of "How come you never promote me?" Be humble and listen, even if you don't like the answer.
If the reason is truly that you don't socialize enough, then like it or not, you need to change, because you may face the exact same issue at your next job. People like to promote people who are "friendly", and people skills may be considered as part of what is needed to do the job one level up. You don't have to spend 20 hours a week socializing, but taking some time to know your co-workers isn't that demanding. How about lunch hour? Do you ever go out with a co-worker, or is he glued to his desk? Using "family responsibilities" as an excuse is a cop-out. Would you never, ever make a new friend because your family occupies all your time?
Paul C
Information Technology and Services Professional
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Disclaimer: This is an opinion from some guy who never met you, never worked at your company and has no credentials that entitle him to offer opinions on human resource type issues.
That being said- I'm going to point you in a similar direction as the previous two posters. You might need to entertain the possibility that your criteria for promotability are not the same as your companies- and I'm not talking about race or culture. It's not 1930 anymore. Your average "white male" just isn't that resistant to bringing somebody who doesn't look like him into the executive suite as they were back in the day. They're generally as eager to find best person for the job as anybody else. The marketplace is too competitive these days to do anything else.
So- The people that got promoted; what do they have that you don't? Where can you improve to get closer to what your company thinks "promotable" looks like? It's definitely not all about who does the job the best in his own eyes, or even objectively. There's likability, how well you get along with the rest of the team, or customers, or a hundred other things that I couldn't even guess at.
Good luck.
Eileen B
IT Professional, Information Security Quality Assurance Operations & Administration / President, CMU SEI LI SPIN
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IMVHO, if you think the reason for your not being promoted is social, what have you done to validate that? We all have a family and some with very large responsibilities. How difficult would it be for you to at least try socializing one or two times to see how it goes? Much easier to get a few hours on Friday for happy hour than to go through the job hunt.
Eileen
Eileen
Greg B
Dir Franchise Sales, Solar Universe; COO, GolfTraxx
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Also having not met this client, may I offer this possibility. Your state that this client is an Asian immigrant, and that they do not do much socializing.
How are the verbal and non-verbal communications skills of this client? If their job performance is 'promotable", but the next level up in the organization requires extensive communications skills (written, verbal, social, industry, conferences, etc.,) then this may be the major factor in not getting the promotion.
As someone pointed out, the client may need to decide if the family responsibilities need to be a lower priority, or if the time of these commitments can be shifted in order to decrease their impact on the work responsibilities.
Mykel de W
Test & Process Consultant Squerist
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Quality of work doesn't always lead to promotion. Socializing with the right people will be helpful,
Karl G
CTO/Owner Intelligent Fusion, Enterprise Architect, Business Strategist, PhD
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Let's cover the basics first. You said he was an asian immigrant. Does he at least have a green card? If not, many companies will treat you like total crap until you do. And most people will just take it, so suck it up and get the card - your future success is your best revenge.
But, assuming this is not the case, what were his co-workers promoted to? If they were promoted to more senior technical positions while you were clearly more competent or got better reviews, then definitely talk to your boss and make sure he understands your frustration and reasons for promotion. Many companies have clearly defined expectations for various positions, so have them take a list of these expectations for the next level and argue why he meets them.
If they were promoted to managerial positions, I would be very careful about playing the race card versus a passive personality card. For management and leadership positions, the ability to interact and work across the team is very important - often quite secondary to actually being the smartest or most knowledgeable person. (In fact, the best engineers often make the worst managers). If he doesn't speak up in meetings or assert his opinions publically, it's unlikely he'll be a very effective manager anyway - particularly with respect to constantly selling the project upward.
I would also remind your client that the squeaky wheel often gets the grease - if you want to be promoted, you need to let your boss know what you want, you need to do things that gets publically noticed, and you need to make sure you get credit when you deserve. But most organizations manage to minimize conflict. Why promote someone who's very meek and probably won't complain over someone who will raise hell and probably quit if they don't get the promotion.
Now, I'm definitely not saying these personality traits fit your client at all - only that he should look to other explanations before playing the race card. I'd bet there's a number of white (or other) people that also weren't promoted. I work with many asians who often lament this very topic and they openly discuss how broad personality traits and cultural differences can act as severe liabilities in an American culture focused so strongly on rewarding type A and obnoxious jerks.
That said, racism and discrimination does exist and it is certainly possible that he was deliberately discriminated against. If he feels this is really true or that the corporate culture won't reward people like him, then perhaps it's time for a new job.
Terri L M
Planning and Strategies Consultant; speaker, trainer, author.
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There is so much more that goes on at social functions than just socializing. If you are missing all of those opportunities, it is important that you find the time to participate in a few. These are events where you can relax and get to know your coworkers and bosses on another level, and where they can get to know you better as an individual and not as a pencil-pusher/compter operator/engineer. It's like all of the serious business that gets accomplished on the golf course.
Should also arrange to have a talk with your direct supervisor/manager. Usually in a larger company there are periodic performance reviews that often include listing your goals within the company. If this has not been a part of your review process, ask if you can set some personal goals for the next year. Just because you want to be promoted doesn't mean your boss knows you want to move up.
Phyllis P
Principal Consultant at Sogeti
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I agree with talkng to the boss and understanding what/why you haven't promoted. If you can't get a straight answer and you feel they are playing games, then open the doors to at least look at other opportunities. A promotion is a promotion....sometimes they come from a job change.
Tom F
Editorial Director at BankInfoSecurity.com
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Wasabi:
Sounds like it's time for a chat with the boss. 'Why am I being overlooked for promotion?' If you don't like the answer, then, yes, it's time to look elsewhere.
best,
Tom
Tacy T
Anthropology/Art Double Major a UC Davis
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Sit down with your boss and have an honest conversation. If you're willing to quit, I'd say you have nothing to lose.
Discuss your goals for advancement and ask for coaching on how you can be considered for the next promotion. See if you can find out what part of your work wasn't a match for the last two.
Be careful of asking any question with "why" in it. Tends to make people defensive.
